A warlock once made a pact with the Powers Above. He snuck in a clause that resurrected him whenever he died, with all his memories intact. He lived for thousands of years in a hundred different bodies, changing the world into a dystopian regime where he could freely pursue his passions: alcohol, television and ducks.

This made the Powers Above very angry, so they erased his memories and reincarnated him as a simple barmaid in a sleepy village where she could do no harm.

I don't know any of this, of course. I just find it very annoying that she's chosen me to tag along with.