I Have to Text my Ex, or the World Explodes

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Do you have an anus? If you do, here's a great little nonsensical story for you to turn off your brain and read while you're stuck in the toilet with nothing to do. Here's the premise of my new story:

Andrew Garage thought he was the Chosen One.Stuck in a time loop that reset whenever a meteor crashed to Earth, he was determined to save mankind and get himself out of the loop. On his seventh try, he finally eliminated the catastrophic meteorite with an Antimatter Gun.However, a self-proclaimed Goddess suddenly appeared and sent Andrew back into the loop again because he saved the world 'the wrong way'. As Andrew bitterly scavenged for solutions, he found out that the reason the meteor kept crashing into Earth because. . . he kept ignoring his exes' texts.

Great for people with anuses and people who want to destroy meteorites. Not recommended for people who expect actual logic like NOT winning the lottery five times in a row.

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OEL/Translated: [edit] [history]
OEL
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N/A
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Last Update:
1040 d, 4 h ago Probably stalled or dropped!
Alternate Names: [edit] [history]
  • I Have to Text my Ex, or the World Explodes
Homepage: [edit] [history]
https://www.royalroad.com/fiction/38232/i-have-to-text-my-ex-or-the-world-explodes
https://www.royalroad.com/fiction/38232/i-want-to-save-the-world-but-the-goddess-tells

Releases found: 23

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Series Releases:

Latest release - ch. 19.0
View Series Vol Chap Extra Group/Host
I Have to Text my Ex, or the World Explodes 19 19. Always remember she's your girl, but the y is silent RoyalRoadL
I Have to Text my Ex, or the World Explodes 18 18. You'll never shat alone RoyalRoadL
I Have to Text my Ex, or the World Explodes 17 17. Sorry, Sir, but I banged your daughter RoyalRoadL
I Have to Text my Ex, or the World Explodes 16 16. And then he died RoyalRoadL
I Have to Text my Ex, or the World Explodes 15 15. There's no free will, but you can get a paid will DLC for ONLY $34.99 RoyalRoadL
I Have to Text my Ex, or the World Explodes 14 14. Maybe if I mess his life up enough he'll like me RoyalRoadL
I Have to Text my Ex, or the World Explodes 13 13. The whole world caught COVID-19 and died RoyalRoadL
I Have to Text my Ex, or the World Explodes 12 12. Sorry for f****** your whole extended family RoyalRoadL
I Have to Text my Ex, or the World Explodes 11 11. This isn't Canada. The houses look like they're affordable RoyalRoadL
I Have to Text my Ex, or the World Explodes 10 10. Now if you'll excuse me, I'll go dip my ass in maple syrup RoyalRoadL
I Have to Text my Ex, or the World Explodes 9 9. Canada is a country? RoyalRoadL
I Have to Text my Ex, or the World Explodes 8 8. Men can't be depressed! They don't cry RoyalRoadL
I Have to Text my Ex, or the World Explodes 6 6. Now you're telling me there will be status screens? RoyalRoadL
I Have to Text my Ex, or the World Explodes 5 5. What's wrong with the prose? Nothing, this is just a light novel RoyalRoadL
I Have to Text my Ex, or the World Explodes 4 4. Offer me that deathless death, Good God RoyalRoadL
I Have to Text my Ex, or the World Explodes 3 3. So your name is GDragon-Dragon? RoyalRoadL
I Have to Text my Ex, or the World Explodes 2 2. What if God descended to Earth, said "it's pronounced Jod", and left RoyalRoadL
I Have to Text my Ex, or the World Explodes 1 1. Let's win the lottery so I can build a lab RoyalRoadL
I Have to Text my Ex, or the World Explodes Just something I want to ask RoyalRoadL
I Have to Text my Ex, or the World Explodes 7.2. Mr. Brittlesworth's Testimony RoyalRoadL
I Have to Text my Ex, or the World Explodes Chapter delay RoyalRoadL
I Have to Text my Ex, or the World Explodes 7.1. Defund the police RoyalRoadL
I Have to Text my Ex, or the World Explodes I'M Back RoyalRoadL